We met again...
Watching the red, white and blue plane approach Sunday afternoon, carrying my soldier along with many others was the most beautiful sight I had seen in quite some time. The emotions were high as I waited to see him step off that plane.
As they all marched past us, I was trying to find him, and when our eyes finally met and the big smile came over his face............the worrying was lifted, he's home.
Jill
We've all been just slogging through these winter months waiting for the end of this deployment. And now here we are in the home stretch. It's almost over. This mom is aleady excited. There is a light at the end of this tunnel and it is not an oncoming train.
Another track season is beginning and Daddy will be here to root for not only Kylie but Haley who is also giving track a try this year. Kylie has already had her first meet of the new season coming in second in the 800m. Both girls trained this winter even in the rain one day.
Last month Kylie sang at the Kennedy Center with her school chorus. Forty-one members of the 4th and 5th grade chorus spent three intense days touring DC while in the Capitol City.
Spring keeps trying to burst forth with promises of warm weather while icy blasts keep sneaking back in as soon as we pack those sweaters away. But with our soldiers beginning to filter back into the country we are all starting to relax as we joyfully look forward to the happy reunions and a summer of fun. In the words of Lee Greenwood, GOD BLESS THE USA. I can already sense the tears of joy in my eyes tonight when the National Anthem is sung at our first baseball game this year. How wonderful it is to have Kyle back on friendly soil.
Someone sent this to Kyle - and he forwarded it to me. Thought all of you would appreciate it as much as I did! Hope all of you are doing well & getting ready for our Soldiers' returns! I for one am eagerly counting down the days!
1. "Aren't you afraid that he'll be killed?"
(This one ranks in at number one on the "duh" list. Of course we're afraid. We're terrified. The thought always lingers at the backs of our minds ---but thanks brilliant, you just brought it back to the front. Maybe next you can go ask someone with cancer if they're scared of dying.)
2. "I don't know how you manage. I don't think I could do it."
(This is intended to be a compliment. Though, its just a little annoying. Here's why: it's not like all of us military wives have been dreaming since childhood of the day we'd get to be anxious single moms who carry cell phones with us to the bathroom and in the shower. We're not made of some mysterious matter that makes us more capable, we just got asked to take on a challenging job. So we rose to the challenge and found the strength to make sacrifices.)
3. "At least he's not in Iraq."
(This is the number one most annoying comment for those whose husbands are in Afghanistan or elsewhere. What do they think is happening in Afghanistan? An international game of golf? Guys are fighting and dying over there.)
4. "Do you think he'll get to come home for Christmas/anniversary/birthday/birth of a child/wedding/family reunion, etc?"
(Don't you watch the news? No! They don't get to come home for any of these things. Please don't ask again.)
5. "What are you going to do to keep yourself busy while he's gone?"
(Short answer: Try to keep my sanity. Maybe there's a military wife out there who gets bored when her husband leaves, but I have yet to meet her. For the rest of us, those with and without children, we find ourselves having to be two people. That keeps us plenty busy. We do get lonely, but we don't get bored, and drinking massive amounts of wine always helps keep me busy.)
6. "How much longer does he have until he can get out?"
(This one is annoying to many of us whether our husbands are deployed or not. Many of our husbands aren't counting down the days until they "can" get out. Many of them keep signing back up again and again because they actually love what they do or they VOLUNTEER AGAIN and AGAIN to go back to Iraq b/c there is work that needs to be done.)
7. "This deployment shouldn't be so bad, now that you're used to it."
(Sure, we do learn coping skills and its true the more deployments you've gone through, the easier dealing with it becomes. And we figure out ways to make life go smoother while the guys are gone. But it never gets "easy" and the bullets and bombs don't skip over our guys just because they've been there before. The worry never goes away.)
8. "My husband had to go to Europe for business once for three weeks. I totally know what you're going through."
(This one is similar to number two. Do not equate your husband's three week trip to London or Omaha or Tokyo or wherever with a 6-15 month or more deployment to a war zone. Aside from the obvious time difference, nobody shot at your husband or tried to blow him up with an I.E.D., your husband could call home pretty much any time he wanted to, he flew comfortably on a commercial plane, slept between crisp white sheets and ate well, paying for everything with an expense account. There is no comparison. We do not feel bonded to you in the slightest because of this comment and, if anything, we probably resent you a bit for it. Comparing a 12 month combat deployment to a few weeks business trip is like comparing a crappy Ford Taurus with a Mercedes convertible.)
9. "Wow you must miss him?"
(This one also gets antoher big "duh". Of course we miss our men. There are some wives who do not and they're now divorced.)
10. "Where is he exactly? Where is that?"
(I don't expect non-military folks to be able to find Anbar Province on a map, but they should know by now that it's in Iraq. Likewise, know that Kabul and Kandahar are in Afghanistan. Know that Muqtada al Sadr is the insurgent leader of the Mahdi Army in Iraq and that Sadr City is his home area. Know that Iran is a major threat to our country and that it is located between Afghanistan and Iraq. Our country has been at war in Afghanistan for seven years and at war in Iraq for five years. These basic facts are not secrets, they're on the news every night and in the papers every day ---and on maps everywhere.)
11. "Well, he signed up for it, so it's his own fault whatever happens over there.
(Yes, ignorant, he did sign up. Each and every day he protects your right to make stupid comments like that. He didn't sign up and ask to be hit by anything, he signed up to protect his country. Oh, and by the way, he asked me to tell you that "You're welcome." He's still fighting for your freedom.)
12. "Don't you miss sex! I couldn't do it!"
(hmmm, no I don't miss sex. I'm a robot. seriously... military spouses learn quickly that our relationships must be founded on something greater than sex. We learn to appreciate the important things, like simply hearing their voices, seeing their faces, being able to have dinner together every night. And the hard truth is, most relationships probably couldn't withstand 12 months of sex deprivation.)
13. "Well in my opinion....."
(Stop right there. I didn't ask for you your personal political opinions. Hey, I love a heated political debate, but not in the grocery store, not in Jamba Juice, not at Nordstrom, not in a bar when I'm out with my girls trying to forget the war, and CERTAINLY NOT AT WORK. We tell co-workers about deployments so when we have to spend lunch hours running our asses off doing errands and taking care of the house, dog, and kids, they have an understanding. We do not tell co-workers and colleagues because we are giving an invitation to ramble about politics or because we so eagerly want to hear how much they hate the President, esp. while we're trying to heat up our lean cuisines in the crappy office microwaves.)
Last, but not least....
14. "OH, that's horrible...I'm so sorry!"
(He's doing his job and he's a badass. Don't be sorry. Be appreciative and please take a moment out of your comfortable American lives to realize that our Soldiers/Marines/Airmen/Coasties/Sailors fight the wars abroad so those wars stay abroad.)
If you want to say anything, just say thank you!!!
'Twas the night before Christmas, he lived all alone
In a one bedroom house made of plaster and stone.
I had come down the chimney with presents to give
And to see just who in this dewelling did live.
I look all around and a strange sight to see
No tinsel, no presents, not even a tree.
No stockings on the mantle, just boots filled with sand
On the wall hung pictures of a far distant lands.
Medals and badges, awards of every kind
The sobering thought came alive in my mind
This house was different, it was dark it was dreary
I had found the home of a soldier,
I could see that most clearly.
The soldier lay sleeping, silent, alone
Curled up on the floor in this one bedroom home.
His face was so gentle,the room in such disorder
Not at all how I pictured a United States soldier.
Was this the hero of whom I just read?
Curled up on a poncho,the floor for a bed?
Then I realized the other families that I saw this night
Owed their lives to this soldiers who are willing to fight.
In the morning 'round the world the children would play
Grown-ups would celebrate a bright Christmas day.
But they all enjoyed freedom,each month of the year
Because of the soldiers like the one laying here.
But I couldn't help but wonder how many lay alone
On a cold Christmas Eve in a lands far from home.
The very thought brought a tear to my eye
And I dropped to my knees and started to cry.
The soldier awakened...I heard his rough voice
"Santa, don't cry, this life is my choice.
I fight for freedom,I don't ask for more
My life is my God, my Country, my Corp."
The soldier rolled over and drifted to sleep
But I couldn't control it, I continue to weep.
I kept watch for hours, so silent and still
As we both shivered from the cold night's chill.
I didn't want to leave him that cold dark night
This Guardian of Honor so willing to fight.
Then...the soldier rolled over and with a voice soft and pure
He whispered,
"Carry on, Santa, it's Christmas Day, all is secure."
One look at my watch...I knew he was right
Merry Christmas, my friend, May God Bless you this night.
~"This poem was written by a Marine stationed in Okinawa Japan.~
Sung By: Ted Berndt
Never in a million years would I have thought I could be feeling totally overjoyed, and yet completely devasted at the same time. I'm so fortunate to have spent 15 wonderful days with Kyle while he was on leave. Of course, there's never enough time to do all that you plan during their time at home, but he was able to spend time with his girls, his friends & family and myself. I can't even begin to find words to express the joy that was brought to me while watching him with his children. From playing a game of "Clue", to gardening and playing tag in the park - I loved the look in their eyes - utter happiness to all three of them to spend that precious time together. Although it's heart-wrenching to see him leave again, I can't help but to feel happiness as well. We're all on the downward slope of this long deployment, and I'm finally seeing a BRIGHT light at the end of this dark tunnel. I hope all of you can say the same. There's still a lot of time left, but it seems right around the corner - maybe I'm disillusioning myself. I've got a much more optimistic outlook for the next (and final) six months! OK, so the confusion part; It broke my heart, as always to say the dreaded and tearful goodbye yesterday morning. As you are all too familiar with - it hurts...phsycially and emotionally....it just plain hurts. Not only to miss them, but to know what they're missing. I'm a very lucky girl this time around - Kyle proposed to me Wednesday night....his last night of leave. I'm so elated over the engagement (and of course the beautiful ring), that I can almost counteract the emptiness of him being gone again. It's amazing to me that my heart and brain can't figure out whether to be sad or happy - a very strange emotion. Whatever his reasons were for proposing on his last night at home, it was perfect timing and now I have even more to look forward to, and a beautiful Key West wedding to plan. The engagement's really been a catalyst for keeping my mind off the sadness and pushing toward the happy, happy future.
Sending you all wishes of support and love - I hope you're well & finding some comfort in knowing we're halfway to home Ladies :)
Daddy Doll was there again today for Kylie at her cross country meet. 
She cut 5 minutes from her previous PR making everyone proud - especially her coaches. And, of course, she was pleased with herself too.
Kyle would have been so proud of Kylie today running her first cross country meet. It was a hot day and they ran at noon making it even worse. But for the first time she actually pushed herself to do her personal best. "I feel like I'm going to throw up," she told me when I got in range to take a picture on her approach for the final loop of the course. But she forged on and completed the run and she wasn't the last one to cross the finish line either. It was a grueling event for her but her attitude was terrific. No tears of self-pity or embarrassment at the end for not doing as well as she'd have liked. "I'm hot," she simply said at the end.
Mom, Shannon, Grandma & Grandpa Ruddock were there with me to cheer her on along with her Daddy Doll who comforted her as she cooled down afterward. She's a real trooper and I know Daddy would have been really proud of her too.
it isn't the same without you by my side darling. However, it does help pass the time and get me through the weekends. Plus the children get so excited, this is rewarding.
I love you JV.
Until we meet again,
Jill
A Mom's Prayer On the First Day of School
Here we are again, Lord. Their backpacks are loaded and their faces are scrubbed and their lunch accounts are full.
And I know you'll walk with them, Lord. You always do. But a mom still has to ask.
Will You walk with them?
Will You whisper to them what they need to hear, when I'm not there to whisper it?
Will You please, oh please, cover their school with the protection only You can give, and will You keep harm far away?
Will You make their minds strong and ready to learn?
Will You help them understand that hard work honors the One who created them?
Will You guide their teachers, giving them patience and wisdom and creativity and more patience? Will You bless them for their efforts?
Will You love all those children there, the ones whose lunch accounts aren't full, the ones who feel alone? Will You teach my children to be kind and unselfish and to love those who are different from them?
Will You point them back toward home just as soon as you can?
Lord, I give them to You today and everyday, trusting them to Your care.
Amen.
Until we meet again,
Jill
his hugs.
If I wrap my arms around myself REAL tight, and he wraps his arms around himself real tight, and you both lean REAL close to the computer screen, you can sometimes feel the hug. :)
Until we meet again,
Jill
