I've got the Powers, Week 3
In honor of the three possibilities of a team's record through two games (2-0, 1-1 or 0-2), allow us to introduce the Two-Fer Edition of the Guesspert Power Rankings ...
1. (+1) New England Patriots: Life is too easy for Tom Brady with too many great receivers.
2. (-1) Indianapolis Colts: Games against Titans becoming too close for comfort.
3. (+1) Pittsburgh Steelers: Defense thinks the 10 points given up through two games is 10 points too many.
4. (+2) Dallas Cowboys: Perfect thus far with no Coach “Too”-na.
5. (+8) Houston Texans: Matt Schaub can’t get too cocky if Andre Johnson is out of lineup.
6. (+9) Green Bay Packers: Who says Lord Favre is too old?
7. (+4) Denver Broncos: Of two different field goal attempts in overtime, we know which one they liked better.
8. (+9) Detroit Lions: Will soon be drawing praises from that area sportswriter who penned “Tuesdays with Morrie.”
9. (+5) San Francisco 49ers: Two victories against division foes is nice way to start.
10. (+8) Washington Redskins: Two opening wins are never too ugly.
11. (-8) San Diego Chargers: For all those in the “I told you so crowd” about Norv Turner — touche.
12. (-7) Chicago Bears: Another season of the two faces of Rex Grossman.
13. (-6) Tennessee Titans: Team will rise and fall with fortunes of dual-threat quarterback.
14. (-5) Seattle Seahawks: Thought this team was too good to botch audible signals.
15. (-7) Baltimore Ravens: Plan to win every game 2-0 sounds like non-sustainable
strategy.
16. (+16) Cleveland Browns: Greatest triumph of Browns 2.0 era.
17. (-10) Cincinnati Bengals: Score 45 points and lost? Maybe they need two Ocho Cincos.
18. (-6) Carolina Panthers: Asking Steve Smith to catch two touchdowns per quarter sounds like non-sustainable strategy.
19. (-3) Minnesota Vikings: Is it too early to nominate Adrian Peterson as rookie of the year? (Yes.)
20. (+7) Arizona Cardinals: When will Ken Whisenhunt melt down into “They Are Who We Thought They Were 2?”
21. (+4) Jacksonville Jaguars: Jack Del Rio’s favorite song? “867-5309.” OK, probably not, but at least we worked in a Tommy Tutone reference.
22. (+8) Tampa Bay Bucs: With first win, Jon Gruden has team halfway to my forecast of their win total for this year.
23. (-2) Buffalo Bills: Some teams look like a million bucks; these guys look like $2 bills.
24. (-2) New York Jets: Some years, Giants Stadium isn’t big enough for two teams. This year? Plenty of leg room.
25. (-1) St. Louis Rams: Hey, Steven Jackson — it’s not too late to start producing. As in, this season.
26. (-2) Miami Dolphins: Seems like this team hasn’t done anything worth cheering since
“2 Legit 2 Quit” was on the radio.
27. (+1) Oakland Raiders: Didja ever notice that no two psychotic Raiders fans are ever dressed exactly alike?
28. (-8) New York Giants: Two-minute warning could also describe remaining coaching tenure of Tom Coughlin.
29. (-6) Philadelphia Eagles: Wish we could stick to talking about football instead of the two sides of the Donovan McNabb debate.
30. (-20) New Orleans Saints: Every teammate is playing poorly, but for this exercise we have to single out Deuce McAllister.
31. (-2) Atlanta Falcons: Byron Leftwich just earned league’s least-glamorous No. 2 quarterback spot
32. (-1) Kansas City Chiefs: Hey, Herm “You play to win the game” Edwards — too bad that philosophy hasn’t worked yet.
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